What is the CEH Process?
Core Emotional Healing® (CEH), is a fully developed healing model and system for addressing the deep emotional wounds and trauma from childhood and culture that are causing psychological, emotional, physical, relationship, work, and other problems and limitations in your life. Because the core issues are healed with CEH, the results are permanent and lasting, and do not require many of the “maintenance practices” that many have been using, and this can even include some medications.
CEH includes referrals to complementary healing modalities to support and facilitate the CEH work. Clients and practitioners have observed that those who are well into the CEH process have more powerful results from other modalities. We believe this is so because the emotional blocks to healing, held in the body, are no longer present.
While the work is focused on the early wounds and aspects of self that were left behind due to neglect, trauma, and simply not being seen and reflected by caregivers, CEH also focuses on supporting the unique gifts of each person. Once the emotional level is deeply healed, the adaptations and protections are no longer needed, intuition and creative gifts flow more freely and clients step into a more natural flow that often includes more synchronicities. In addition, because CEH includes undoing limiting beliefs, there are less blocks to manifesting what one truly wants.
The CEH process consists of 5 key steps:
- Listen to the meanings of your symptoms and the messages from your wounded inner child
- Connect to, love, and reparent your inner child by validating your childhood feelings
- Feel and express repressed emotions, especially sadness and anger, and comfort your inner child
- Heal yourself by finding the source of your triggers in your emotional wounds, shadow projections, and personal boundaries
- Take care of your feelings and set healthy boundaries so you are true to yourself in your relationships
Step 1: Listen to the meanings of your symptoms and the messages from your wounded inner child
Change the way you view your symptoms, they don’t mean there is something wrong with you. Instead of treating and attacking them, leaving you feeling depleted or hopeless, listen to them and attend to your feelings with love and care. We can help you find the meanings of your symptoms, which are messages from your wounded inner child. Then, listen to them with compassion and curiosity, giving your inner child what they have always wanted. Develop a supportive, nurturing relationship with your body, symptoms, and emotions.
CEH Self Study Lesson One will help you with your mindset shift from feeling defeated to hopeful and inspired to continue down this path.
Messages from the Body will confirm what is still active from childhood to heal with your inner child.
Flower Essence Webinar will help you understand how specific flower essences can help you access your repressed feelings and memories from childhood, open your heart, and develop self love and self reflection.
Step 2: Connect to, love, and reparent your inner child by validating your childhood feelings so you internalize unconditional love and acceptance for yourself
It takes time to really reconnect with and nurture parts of yourself that were lost in childhood, at different ages. These include your vulnerability, strength, wisdom, gifts, magical and free child, and more. Through internal reparenting, and exploring your true self and gifts while being supported by us, you will feel safer, more seen and appreciated for who you really are.
CEH Self Study Lesson Two will help you become aware of defenses, the ways you have protected yourself from your childhood feelings, and the ways you continue to distract and avoid your feelings. You will need support and guidance to recognize your defenses and protections. Often, as you begin to move through the process and access your inner child and vulnerability, your defenses can get stronger, and trickier! This is all just part of healing.
Lesson Two will also help you understand what it takes to heal your inner child through the Core Emotional Healing process. Because the very ways you did not receive the love and support you needed, and for other reasons, this is something that needs to be learned through specific guidance customized for you. The healing comes from giving your inner child what you never got and still need.
The Inner Child Meditation in Lesson Two will help you connect with your inner child. Many people believe that they have fully connected in the way they need to, but our experience has shown that this is often not the case. You will need our help in uncovering how you were hurt and to let go of the protections. We will help you throughout the process find ways to connect more with your inner child and feelings, and help you give your inner child love, support and acceptance.
Step 3: Feel and express repressed emotions, especially sadness and anger, and comfort your inner child
This first involves acknowledging how you were hurt and parts of you were neglected, which is often hard to see on your own since you had to protect yourself from the pain. In addition, you were encouraged and wanted to maintain a positive view of your parents/caregivers. Through other’s sharing in the group, and help understanding your childhood family dynamics, both overt and subtle, your inner child can feel validated and seen in how they were poorly treated. In addition, how you feel and what you believe about yourself and the world is information that can point you to the issues in your childhood. Seeing all of this requires help from professionals.
CEH Self Study Lesson Three will help you learn about the purpose of all of your emotions, so you can allow and express feelings that you may have not allowed due to your conditioning and childhood family experiences. You will also learn how to process - write about, feel, and fully express - your feelings to completion and then comfort your inner child. As mentioned above you will need our insights and guidance to make sure you aren’t misdirecting your anger or still protecting your parents and others who have hurt you.
Step 4: Heal yourself by finding the source of your triggers in your emotional wounds, shadow projections, and personal boundaries
If you are disconnected from your childhood feelings, you may not be feeling the source of your emotional triggers, and that is why your body is expressing physical symptoms. Emotional triggers can lead you back to your childhood wounds (source of the trigger), reveal your shadow (rejected aspects of self), and alert you when there has been a boundary violation. These all get clearer after you’ve been supported through the process, and fully feel the healing emotions (anger, sadness, grief, fear, shame) from childhood.
CEH Self Study Lesson Four will help you recognize when you are triggered, explore the sources of the trigger and how to resolve it, healing your past, and providing guidance for healthy boundaries and greater self love in the present. You will need our guidance and insight at times to help you identify the sources of your triggers and/or how to ask for what you need and protect yourself from those who can’t meet your needs.
Step 5: Take care of your feelings and set healthy boundaries so you are true to yourself in your relationships
Once you’ve reconnected to your inner child, expressed your repressed emotions, and started to heal through your triggers, you will have greater access to your natural emotional guidance system and intuition and you will respond to what you need in the moment. Based on how you feel, you can clearly ask for what you need, set healthy boundaries, and know what is good for you, so you are true to yourself and live a more fulfilled life.
CEH Self Study Lesson Five reviews the whole process and provides worksheets to help you set healthy boundaries This requires the healing that is included in the first 4 steps of the CEH process. By giving your inner child the love and emotional support they, and you, have always needed, you will no longer seek outside acceptance or putting others needs ahead of your own. With this, you will more easily change from codependency into more healthy and fulfilling relationships.
Stages of CEH
After you’ve reconnected to your true feelings and you are taking care of them, your physical and psychological symptoms will resolve, and your unconscious protections and adaptations will start to fall away.
Being clear about your feelings, you will know what you want and don’t want, what’s good for you, and what isn’t. You continue to process your triggers and set healthy boundaries as more layers and patterns arise.
Being empowered, you will feel safe expressing your true self knowing that you can set healthy boundaries and standing up for yourself and what you really want. Your adaptations and protections are no longer needed. You live more fully from your heart with sensitivity and compassion. You have clarity to speak your truth.
Blocks to Healing
- You don’t trust support, and think you can do it alone.
- You protect your parents and hide your feelings (unconsciously acting from your defenses and protections) so you don’t feel your repressed emotions and stay in your triggered emotions.
- You don’t reparent your inner child and look outside of yourself for approval, to feel better, and for emotional support.
- You stay in dysfunctional and toxic relationships.
Emotional healing is a journey and as you can see from the CEH Process diagram, it’s also often a cycle. You will find that different things are needed at different phases of your personal journey. Sometimes, you’ll even go back and revisit tools or processes that you used in the past, this happens a lot with our clients.
It’s important that your expectations of the tools you use are appropriate and that you don’t become discouraged or give up when you don’t see immediate results or when it feels like you’re moving backwards. This will happen, and it doesn’t mean that you are doing anything wrong.
When you’re able to, put down the books and courses and start working with the right professionals to uncover your blindspots, reveal what is hidden in your subconscious, and receive the love, care, and support necessary to process all that has been hiding under the surface.
One of the necessary parts of healing is uncovering the unconscious processes that keep you in unhealthy patterns.
Let’s look at what three geniuses had to say about this…
Sigmund Freud, the grandfather of modern psychology said, “...self-analysis is really impossible, otherwise there would be no illness" and “all of psychoanalysis is dealing with resistance”.
Similarly, the founder of Gestalt Therapy, Fritz Perls said, “Awareness heals” and pretty much all Gestalt techniques are aimed at increasing awareness.
For both Freud and Perls, bringing unconscious content into conscious awareness is the only way to heal, and there is natural resistance to doing so.
In short, the resistance to bringing the things we need to heal into awareness is because we adapted to our difficulties by repressing them and protecting ourselves from the pain. And again, these are the very things that cause us problems.
And finally, Albert Einstein said, “We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.”
So much for self-help books for real and lasting emotional healing. A book just isn’t capable of giving you the perspective and support that brings you into your true self and fulfillment in life.
We need professionals to help support us through our resistance so that we can see ourselves clearly, to see what is actually motivating us to maintain our problematic patterns. Then, to be guided through the process of healing.
I have an online course, the CEH Self Study, which walks people through the entire process. Even the online course, with all of the impactful content it includes, will have limited results unless you are using it at the same time that you work with a professional who supports the CEH process.
I want to make this very clear - you hold the power to your healing, but none of us can do it alone.
I even teach a live 6-week class to review my online course because, though the ideas are simple enough, there are too many blindspots and defenses that get in the way of understanding - never mind doing the actual healing work. In the 6 week class, I repeat myself a lot because most people won’t get it the 1st, and for some, even after several times. This is because it’s natural for humans to avoid emotional pain, which is well understood by mental health professionals. But again, healing that emotional pain is a necessary key.
People will read a book, just like they read all other books, from the same mindset that is creating their symptoms and patterns. They will read it through the lens of their protections and defenses and believe they are doing the work when they aren’t.
I’ve even worked with people who went through the entire online course and thought they did it but did it their own way, the way they are comfortable with, but these ways are not what was taught in the lessons.
For example, I had a client “do the work” by recreating stories about her childhood - not part of the CEH process. And another who sat and “let the energy of anger flow” through her without ever actually physically expressing her anger as she was instructed. Also, so many people don’t even know they are in abusive relationships, because that’s all they know about love. It takes supportive reflection, often repeated, as happens in group therapy and/or with a professional, for them to see this truth.
Bottom line… you can’t heal through a book, nor can you do it alone through my online course. If you have done deep work on some issues that these address, you may heal some through the insight and understanding provided, or you may heal a layer of some issue(s), but there is more in terms of depth and other issues that will remain unhealed.
What the course will do is prepare you and open you up to the process and provide a road map of understanding of the process, and these are valuable steps.
To really heal, you will have to commit to working with us, consistently for 4-6 months, and get more support after that. That is what it takes to move through your resistance, defenses, and adaptations. It can also mean unlearning, or at least not adding to, old ways that you believed were helping you to heal as you learn the new approaches.
If you don’t have the money for that level of personal support, start with the 6-week class, or the CEH online course and join our Facebook Support Group for our insights and guidance through the process. If you want to heal, stop spending money on quick fixes and save-up and invest in your true healing.
You can learn more about our CEH supported programs here
Lots of love,